As coronavirus rages on, tensions are running high across the globe – and understandably so.
But it appears that not only is COVID-19 causing widespread panic and stockpiling, but it’s also making people fall out with friends, family and partners because of a difference in opinion on how to tackle the situation.
There seems to be three camps: the pragmatic ones, who are following WHO guidance on washing hands and buying some extra tins of baked beans but overall remaining calm; the panicked ones, who are preparing for the worst by doing the most (self-isolating/stockpiling/cancelling holidays) and the chilled out ones.
The latter feel ‘it’s not that bad yet’ or who may have gone through similar or worse crises in the past, and are bunkering down by, well, not bunkering down.
Coronavirus has seen some communities come together – with people offering to buy food for elderly or sick strangers – but cracks are starting to show between the three camps (mostly the panicked and the chilled out).
Many are comparing COVID-19 arguments to peak Brexit times, when Leavers and Remainers were at odds.
So, what are the arguments about? Are people ending friendships or relationships over coronavirus? Here’s what they told us.
‘I’ve been struggling with this for the past two weeks with basically everyone. Sister has a PhD in public health. Called me a few weeks ago and said “get prepared and tell your friends too”. Called all my friends, they all said I was a catastrophist. I shared news, they’d say it’s only for California or New York.
‘Now we’re here and they’re believing me. But it’s too late, store shelves are empty and the virus is everywhere. This is so much more than “washing your hands.”’
‘My husband and I have completely different outlooks on handling coronavirus. I’m the type of person to sing a full verse, chorus and bridge while washing my hands every time, while he’s a lot more… relaxed about it all. For example, as soon as I get home every day, I follow public health advice and wash my hands but he doesn’t seem to have that same urgency.
‘It worries me that he’s so relaxed about taking the necessary precautions because if he gets sick, we live in a tiny flat and it’s inevitable I’ll get sick too. It’s meant that we’ve gotten into arguments because I’ll be reminding him about the precautions, asking him to cover his mouth when he coughs or asking how many times he’s washed his hands and he’ll think that I’m nagging him.
‘We’ll get into an argument and things will be tense, but I wouldn’t forgive myself if anything happened because we slipped up and didn’t take the necessary precautions.’
‘No major fall-outs but I think I’m definitely the doom monger of all my friends. General attitudes have been “ahh it’ll all blow over” and “it’s just the elderly getting it”. I’m over here like, erm it’s a huge deal and also my mum is classed as “elderly” so cheers for that! It’s made for some very tense exchanges.
‘Also, I’ve had to do a fair amount of convincing of my parents. They’ve seen SARS, swine flu, bird flu. They feel it’s being over-hyped. I’m caught between wanting to believe that and also screaming “look at Italy”. They have though, cancelled their Rome trip now!’
‘So one of my best friends has been planning a round the world trip since early 2019 – with the aim of leaving this weekend. She’s booked various flights/hotels/experiences and quit her job etc. Five girls (myself included) were set to travel to Madrid this weekend for a mini girls trip and to see her off (her next stop is Peru). Our group chat is intense right now.
‘Three of us have pulled out as Madrid has shut all schools/museums etc and has a much higher case of Covid-19 than here. Anyway I’ve been posting daily updates on Madrid so that we can all make the best decisions and she has not been happy about that.
‘I think because she’s going regardless, she doesn’t want to hear anything that potentially gets in the way – but she understands her entire trip may be cancelled if more countries close borders.’
‘I had a big argument with a friend the other day. I deal with anxiety by making jokes, and so I said something like ‘someone coughed on me on the tube and now my throat feels weird’ but he did not take it well. I get it, he’s got a health issue but I’m frustrated because yes, I am actually somewhat frightened but I have the right to deal with it in my own way. Jokes are my way.’
‘I’m definitely being chilled about it. What happens happens. Some people are definitely being a bit crazy over it. A colleague’s husband questioned us making each other cups of tea.’
How to avoid falling out with people over coronavirus
Registered psychologist and cognitive behavioural psychotherapist Dr Becky Spelman, also clinical director of Private Therapy Clinic, gives her top tips on how to coronavirus arguments and keep a cool head:
‘The key message is respect,’ she says. ‘Whatever opinion people have, remember that these are your friends and if you think of respect first and foremost, you can then put forward your opinions while also respecting theirs.
‘Coronavirus has sparked interesting conversations and leaves a lot of anxiety when people are talking to their friends. It’s not about not having these conversations but remembering that we don’t know everything, and actually we don’t know who is right.
‘Avoid arguments but don’t avoid putting your points across. It’s best to listen to your friend’s point first and hear their point of view, acknowledge what they’ve said and that you’ve taken this on board – then offer your opinion.
‘If it gets heated, it’s best not to engage and suggest moving on the conversation. This is’t something we should be arguing about, as we need each other right now and actually, knowing support is around us is gonna help people stay healthy through this crisis.’
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source https://metro.co.uk/2020/03/13/people-tell-us-falling-friends-coronavirus-concerns-12392080/?ITO=squid
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