Welcome to How I Do It, the series in which we give you a seven-day sneak peek into the sex life of a stranger.
This week we hear from Mayla Green, a married 44-year-old sex shop owner in New Jersey.
She has sex with her husband around two times a week and it’s ‘playful and adventurous’.
Mayla absolutely loves having access to an unlimited supply of toys and enhancers, and for those of you wondering whether her husband’s a fan of her area of work – he loves it.
‘My husband thinks owning a sex shop is super fun. He loves the idea of wholesale lubes and lotions, so we are liberal with our lube and are always trying new massage oils to add a touch of romance,’ she says.
‘I launched The Adult Toy Shop after we met, and he actually helped to design the website so his IT background was very useful for saving programming fees.’
Mayla founded her store in 2008 after three years of working as a sex shop employee elsewhere.
Despite the expectation that she’s a deeply sexual person because of her work, she says ‘the novelty has worn off’.
‘At first, looking through catalogues filled with hundreds of sex toys from various manufacturers made me super horny all the time, but in the following years I’m not as horny as I used to be,’ she explains.
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But her love for trying everything out and incorporating sex toys into her intimate life she feels still makes her hornier than most.
Her husband doesn’t shy away from using toys either. ‘My husband is a pleaser and, if a sex toy is more pleasing to me than him, all he wants is to be involved,’ she adds.
‘He loves seeing my satisfied face after an orgasm, so if he gets to use a toy on me, that in itself is satisfying for him.’
So, without further ado, here’s how Mayla got on this week…
The following sex diary is, as you might imagine, not safe for work.
Monday
Being an online sex shop owner sounds glamorous. Mondays, however, are not so glamorous. I begin my work week answering emails and explaining to customers that yes, the big dildo you ordered is big; it says so in the description, and no, you cannot return it. That’s gross.
Most emails are from long-term married couples looking for some suggestions to spice up a boring and/or repetitive sex life. I’ve been happily married since 2009, and even though my husband and I have a vibrant, fun and playful sex life, we too can get stuck in a rut.
Humans are creatures of habit and it’s easy to fall into a regular routine because it’s comfortable and natural (but eventually gets boring), so I make sure to bring a goodie bag of new toys home each week for us to spice it up.
Then on Mondays, I can provide tried and tested suggestions to other couples in the same situation, to help them have a vibrant sex life, too.
Tuesday
Tuesday is blog article day. The most common informative search query I get on the site is ‘how to use a dildo’. This one comes as a surprise, because it really seems like the most self-explanatory sex toy, yet it goes beyond just ‘thrust in and out’.
So how should you properly use a dildo? My number one sexpert tip is to rub your clit while playing with a dildo. Regardless if you use your dildo slow or fast, deep or shallow, light or hard, stimulating the clit will greatly boost your sexual pleasure.
Simultaneous vaginal penetration and clitoral stimulation can produce what’s called a blended orgasm. The clitoris and G-spot are closely linked, they even share nerve pathways so when you rub the clit while playing with a dildo, your orgasm feels much stronger.
It’s the whole concept behind the ever-famous rabbit vibrator, to experience pleasure from both internal and external stimulation at the same time.
Maybe I’ve been desensitised to sex toys because I’ve been using them for so long, but if it doesn’t have a motor in it, it just doesn’t get me off.
The pussy buzzing pleasure is just to die for. Buzz my clit, buzz my G-spot; the pounding orgasm pulses throughout my body and it’s fucking sexy.
Wednesday
Wednesday is sex toy review day. Remember the Rose Toy? It was the TikTok sensation for a while a year ago or so. The Rose is an air-pulse clit-sucker that looks like a blooming rose.
It has a pretty and clever design, completely non-phallic and passable for any sexual topic filters that would ordinarily ban content on Instagram and Facebook.
I was so excited to try The Rose at home! And WTF… I didn’t like it!
The hard flat surface does not follow the contours of the labia. It made poor contact with the clitoral hood and barely felt like a whisper. My husband gives better head than this.
My experience with the Rose goes to show that just because you see a sex toy advertised everywhere does not necessarily mean it’s good!
The best clit sucker toys are small, contoured to your hand and have a flexible silicone rim around the opening so that it creates a tight air seal around the clit. These give better head than my husband.
Thursday
It’s been a busy week of typing at my computer, so now it’s time to take some new sex toys home and enjoy a romp in the hay with the man of the house.
The hottest trend in male sex toys right now is prostate stimulators. If my husband were reading this over my shoulder, he’d cringe at me sharing the story, but it’s really what happens in the week of a female sex shop owner – I don’t have a prostate so I need a test subject that has one.
I can just sense my husband puckering up his butthole right now.
For the guys out there, anal play is powerful stuff. There are so many sensitive nerve endings around the prostate that it’s even called “the male G-spot”. He enjoys the feel of prostate toys, but only when I’m using them on him.
It can be awkward for guys to reach around back there on their own, so one of my all-time favorite sex tips is to jerk him off or give him head while using your spare hand to rock a prostate dildo back and forth inside his anus.
Move rhythmically yet slowly with both hands in unison. He’ll want to cum quickly, but keep moving slow to prevent him from blowing his load too soon. The gradual build-up increases intensity of the orgasm once it happens.
When you feel him start ejaculating, however, rock faster and suck harder to skyrocket his orgasm into pure bliss.
Friday
I received some emails from boutique sex toy manufacturers advertising new products, and there are some bizarre trends on their way. Your sex toy stash is about to be taken over by alien dildos – no, I’m not kidding.
These dildos looks like an octopus tentacle or ET’s finger, but with a slight G-spot curve at the tip of the finger.
I like to keep it classy and elegant in the bedroom, but curiosity got the best of me, so I’m taking home a tentacle dildo tonight to make love with.
I guess it’s all those nights shoving toys up my husband’s ass, but he finally feels like he’s getting his revenge tonight. He’s a bit too enthusiastic with the tentacle dildo, like he’s a 20-year-old guy seeing a naked woman for the first time.
Forget being classy tonight: I go with the fantasy and don’t really know what to think, but I’m getting f**ked with an octopus tentacle and the suction discs and the increasing girth don’t even feel like a sex toy. But I’m getting horny because of the curved tip that’s rubbing my G-spot.
I’ll just focus on the G-spot pleasure then quietly toss the octopus dildo in the trash after tonight’s episode…
Saturday
It’s my mum’s birthday today. I have an endless supply of adult gag gifts and my mum has a good sense of humour about being embarrassed. She is getting Kong, the 10-inch long, three-inch thick, realistic penis dildo with fake pubic hair and dimpled, squished-looking balls and a suction cup base.
If you want to talk about historical sex toys, Kong is a dildo from Doc Johnson, one of the original sex toy brands that was around when I was working in brick and mortar sex shops 20 years ago.
The only people who purchased Kong did so as a gag gift (or so they said, I certainly wouldn’t want a sex shop clerk to know I’m cramming myself full with 10 inches of fake c**k). I sold about one Kong per month.
Thanks to anonymity of the internet, I now sell about two Kongs per week. What’s with the number discrepancy? Does that mean that people secretly craved giant c**ks before but because they couldn’t buy one discreetly they would forgo their ultimate sexual fantasy? That’s so sad if so!
Now, at least people can get f**ked with octopus dildos and giant 10-inch d**ks to their little hearts’ content, without feeling like a pervert buying one from another human and having to explain it away as a “gag gift” or “my friend asked my to buy it for him”. It’s a great world we live in, isn’t it?
Sunday
Time to have some fun with the husband again. As I said, we’ve been married since 2009 and even though we’re madly in love after all these years, having the one penis forever can feel like more of the same.
Time to dive into the tickle trunk of sex toys and find something new to try. I tell him, “let’s enjoy a penis sleeve tonight, honey”. He says “sure”.
Whatever gets him laid is a good thing, I suppose. Let’s go for fantasy sex tonight.
I’ll even slip on my sexy babydoll. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother because he just takes it off anyway, but lingerie does make me feel sexy, and it’s free for me, so why not?
But first I have to dress his c**k in something special… I have a secret fantasy about being stretched wide with a thick penis.
It’s not something I crave on a regular basis, but the fantasy does rear its wild head every now and then. It feels good to have everything stretched. It tingles, and when you cum, and you feel the pulse with the muscle clenching goodness of the orgasm around it.
So that’s exactly why penis girth sleeves are so damn popular. It also replaces the same old penis with a new sensation. Personally, I like the realistic sleeve because, unlike an octopus dildo, it feels like I’m getting f**ked by a human – just a well-endowed one.
There’s a secret benefit to c**k sleeves I should tell you about: Sex with a penis sleeve lasts longer because the thick padding mutes some of the sensations of a honeylicious warm vagina.
It’s a great option if you’re a guy who sometimes struggles with premature ejaculation.
Time to close out another week in the life of a sex shop owner. Off to bed with my tingly overstretched vagina and a body full of pulsating sex hormones.
Ahhhhh… life is good.
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