This week’s How I Do It, our sex and love diary series, features a story that many people will be able to relate to.
Meet Alex*, a 26-year-old man who has just come back from holiday from a country that was added to the Government’s restricted list while he was away – and who is now forced to isolate for 14 days.
The singleton, who is straight, has four housemates and lives in a house with a garden, but the boredom is still tough – as is the fact that he can’t have sex with other people, since he’s not in an ‘established’ relationship.
And so, Alex spends most of his days doing the thing he loves most: masturbating and watching porn (including during work hours).
Let’s find out more, shall we?
Monday
It’s day one of quarantine after a trip away, and I’ve managed to busy myself doing productive bits of life admin around my day at work.
I finish late, but I’m quite impressed with my performance – and not going on adult websites while self-isolating (so far).
I thought about sex a few times but generally fairly fleetingly. I tend to wank maybe four times a week and watch porn on at least three out of those occasions.
Tuesday
The post-holiday blues appear to have arrived and I am increasingly aware that as a single man heading into what will probably be the worst winter of our lives with minimal dating opportunities, the prospects for my sex life are not looking fabulous.
Working from home is quite tedious and I’m starting late today.
I have a shower and think an ‘imagination wank’ might be fun. It is actually distinctly average, as usual.
I think about a past lover or three, orgasm and autopilot through the day.
Wednesday
I don’t really use Instagram much but I’m scrolling through it while waiting for the shower to get warm and this delightful young lady I went to university with has just put up a ridiculously saucy picture from her holiday, blatantly to show off her body.
All the blokes who have liked it know exactly what’s going on, so does she and so do I.
I contemplate liking it myself and then realise that I’ll be a creep like the rest of them, so I refrain, get in the shower and instead succumb to the urge of having an imagination wank, again.
It is, shock horror, distinctly average – why do I this to myself?
I suppose it vaguely satisfies some needs, even if short-lived and not particularly pleasurable. Plus I’m bored and, for once, don’t have anything better to do with my time.
Thursday
I wake up having had a sensational sex dream about two pals of mine who are both super hot and have also completely and utterly friend-zoned me in real life (sigh).
Anyway, back to the dream – they would be the ultimate threesome combo – one is a brunette, tanned and skinny, the other is blonde and curvy. They’re both lovely and fun, but also gorgeous and outrageously naughty, almost too naughty for me.
I remember every dirty detail when I wake up, but the memory starts to fade throughout the morning, as dreams irritatingly do.
I’ve never had a wet dream, perhaps bizarrely, and even this scenario doesn’t break the duck.
Back in the real world, I decide to masturbate while thinking about that and climax quite a lot.
Friday
It is a hectic day at work.
I vaguely think about sex during my fourth workout of the week (I’m impressed with myself too), consider wanking and can’t be bothered after yesterday’s fun.
I wouldn’t masturbate as much if I had a girlfriend, but I’m generally too picky and also quite enjoy the freedom of being able to do my own thing. Plus I currently don’t really have any options, so it is me and my hand for now.
Later, my housemate asks me about which celebrities I think are good-looking, which is an entertaining distraction for 20 minutes or so.
I don’t know if it’s the same for other blokes, but if I’ve had a decently ‘satisfying’ orgasm, the urge to have another one takes longer to return.
So tonight, I just fall asleep.
Saturday
It’s my day off, so I lie in and watch porn for a while.
I open a few different tabs and then watch them one after the other, generally fast-forwarding through repetitive bits.
I probably spend 30 to 40 minutes doing this when I feel the need to have a decent orgasm – and this morning I really need a wank.
Later, I scroll through a couple of dating apps once or twice. I’m texting a nice lass that I’m going to date post-quarantine, but otherwise just get on with other things.
Sunday
I’m off today too, which is nice. I plan to do some cooking, more workouts and no wanks.
But a mate of mine with amazing boobs that I’ve had sex many times has other ideas and texts me some sex-related questions, before sending me a picture of said boobs.
It’s fairly unexpected and a bit random, but I don’t have much to do anyway so I treat myself to a posh wank and end up scrolling through the ‘big tit’ section on a porn website (vulgar, I know) to look at alongside her photo.
It’s fun and I drag it out longer, which is more satisfying than the PG imagination wanks of earlier this week.
*Name has been changed.
How I Do It
In Metro.co.uk’s How I Do It you get a sneak peek into a week of a person’s sex and love life – from vanilla love-making to fetishes, threesomes and polyamorous relationships, they reveal it all.
Fancy taking part yourself? Email almara.abgarian@metro.co.uk for more information.
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source https://metro.co.uk/2020/10/02/how-i-do-it-man-who-spending-isolation-masturbating-13285780/
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