Since lockdown began, experts and the people behind dating apps have wondered exactly how the coronavirus pandemic will change the way we form relationships.
As you might expect, it turns out these strange times have had quite the impact on our love lives.
We’ve been told couples are having less sex in lockdown, covid cuffing and love lockdowners have popped up as new phenomena, and we’re more open to virtual dating as a result of these last few months.
Now, new research from dating app Hinge suggests that our experiences amid Covid-19 have made many of us want to settle down – resulting in the ticking of our ‘dating clock’, that internal beat that tells us it’s time to get into a ‘proper’ relationship.
According to Hinge’s research, months in lockdown have given us the time to reflect on what we want in terms of a potential partner.
Two out of three Hinge users say they want to change the way they date once it’s safe to meet again, 45% reported developing new healthy dating habits during the pandemic, and since March, more than two thirds say they’re thinking more about who they’re really looking for.
Hinge’s director of relationship science, Logan Ury, tells Metro.co.uk: ‘If you hear your dating clock ticking, it’s time to get serious about finding a partner. First, take a moment to reflect on what specifically has been holding you back. Then ask yourself how you can create new healthy habits.’
You’ll know your dating clock is ticking when you’re just not feeling satisfied by superficial conversations and surface-level hookups and situationships that never really get serious.
When you’re dating clock ticks, you’ll know you’re ready to find someone who’s actually right for you – but what do you do next?
Logan advises these steps.
What to do when your dating clock starts ticking
- Diagnose your bad dating habits – What are your most common dating patterns? Do you tend to judge people too quickly without giving them a chance? Do you find yourself holding back on dates because you’re worried about rejection? Or do you always wait to be approached and shy away from taking the initiative?
- Replace bad habits with new, healthy ones – The best way to kick a bad habit is to replace it with a healthy new one. If you tend to judge people quickly, challenge yourself to give someone a real chance, such as a second video date. If you fear rejection, remind yourself that the only way you’ll get into a relationship is by actually opening up about your life and investing in another person.
- Have an accountability partner – Go through this exercise with a friend and commit to holding each other accountable for your new behaviors. Once a week, perhaps on Sunday nights, check-in with your friend. Be honest about how each of you did with upholding your new dating habits. Congratulate each other when you’re successful, and provide helpful encouragement when you need help getting back on track.
Experts back up the idea that life in lockdown and being faced with the threat of a devastating illness can make us reflect on what we want in our romantic relationships.
Sex and relationship expert Jessica Leoni predicted that the pandemic would lead to a make or break moment for relationships, with lockdown putting bonds under greater scrutiny and daters given the space and time to think about whether their relationships are working for them.
Dr Daria J Kuss, associate professor in psychology and associate course leader MSc Cyberpsychology at Nottingham Trent University, believes living through coronavirus will cause a shift in our priorities, while psychologist Dr Hamira Riaz reckons finding a longterm partner will take on a new importance.
Dr Riaz told Metro.co.uk: ’21st-century dating provides myriad opportunities to pick and choose potential partners. Romantic relationships have become more disposable as a result.
‘Lockdown has compelled us all to more closely examine the quality of our personal lives, and I think people will put more of a premium on finding a trusted intimate to share home life with now.’
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source https://metro.co.uk/2020/08/07/living-coronavirus-pandemic-has-made-dating-clocks-start-tick-13098210/
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